When I finish a hard worked piece, I think I've done well and I am usually satisfied with myself. When looking at it the next morning, I can't help but feel a letdown of sorts because I no longer love the work as much. My exuberance and enthusiasm when painting it may have clouded my judgment and what I thought was working turns out in the end not to be the case. Looking at it with fresh eyes, so to speak, and with some ‘distance’, I am not moved by my effort.

Mind you, I put my heart and soul into the piece; it had my full commitment; but on seeing it anew the following day, I can't help but think I somehow missed the mark. The feelings from the night before have quelled and in the light of a new day the work seems lackluster and boring. This is a constant dilemma and I have no ready answer for it. I am sure it happens to many artists. So I open this up for you to think about.  When striving to be better, are we too fussy?  Should we be satisfied with everything we do?  Are we trying too hard and end up shooting ourselves in the foot?  Can we get away with the results as they are? Why does it matter so much?

I think back on my youth and wonder why it is I strive to be better at what I do.  It could be the upbringing I received by my parents or the fact they worked hard at what they did to give me a better life that I now feel I should strive to be better?  This could be my way of paying them back.  But who now is there to care how good I do?  We artists all know art doesn’t pay much. We devote ourselves in the service of art with little reward.  So why care if we do well at it?

One of my idols and mentors is Rembrandt. Not only for the work he produced but if you know anything about his life, he was a rebel. He painted what he wanted, how he wanted.  Rembrandt constantly was changing his approach to his painting, looking for a new way to say things, a different way to apply paint to get a realistic result.  In the end he paid dearly for this rebelliousness and died broke with all his belongings and treasures being sold off to pay his numerous debts.  So, can I do mediocre work and be happy with that?  Should I ease up on myself and give myself a break?  My only answer to date that I can come up with is, I have to satisfy myself that what I do is the very best I can do at this time and work like heck to always be better.  I wonder if this is the struggle of all artists to never be satisfied with yesterday’s effort and strive for more.

Are we meant to be artists?  Is it fair to say that if we work at something long enough, we should succeed at it?  If you have a love for a profession, shouldn’t you be allowed to benefit from it? Make your living from it?  What kind of a world would it be if everyone who wished to be an artist became one?  Is this even possible?  All this may be true if we are making doughnuts or widgets or go into accounting, but not with fine art.

Today many who are taking up the craft of fine art will never rise to a level where they will get national or international recognition. Many may achieve local notoriety but will not make enough money to survive on art alone.  Today we can’t be a judge or discourage anyone wishing to be an artist even if, as a teacher or practicing professional, you know in your heart this person will never achieve their goal.

It goes hand in hand with being politically correct. Nowadays teachers can't tell a new student "not to quit their day job". You can't tell anyone they are mediocre anymore without incurring the wrath of those who think everyone is entitled to be whatever they set their mind to even if they have no aptitude for art.  It's a dilemma that won't go away soon. Given the state of much of the contemporary art being made today, you can understand why everyone thinks with a week’s instruction; they too, can be a professional artist.  Being an artist is not about learning rules, methods and techniques.  It goes deeper than that.  It goes to the heart of what art is or at least should be. Art is more than a craft or expression.  It is a way of seeing the world and having the ability to express it effectively and convincingly.

There are good painters out there doing great work, but will never be in museums because their work is representational and painted in a style that requires years of study. Many refuse to put in the time it takes to learn to paint. And it takes a lifetime.

Being self-delusional to an extent is necessary for a successful career. But, you have to back it up with quality work and inventory. You also have to dedicate yourself to a life of strife and turmoil and understand that even when you produce a "work of art", you may still go unnoticed. When do you throw in the towel and surrender? Today we are told to follow our dreams, keep at it and we will get there. Not so!  It helps if you have talent, but talent alone will not keep your boat afloat. Too many waste their lives thinking they can do anything they put their mind to; again, it will probably not happen. Self- help books help only one person-the author. Will we ever stop believing we’re meant to be great artists?  Probably not!